back-to-school tips

I love August–it’s back-to-school time! I stroll along the aisles in the local drugstores and check out all the pencils, pens, notebooks, binders. It all holds such promise! And I always walk away with something — after all, I’m enrolled in the school of life and there are lessons to be learned everyday!

My current favorite thing is this 3-hole punched pencil case that could go inside one’s binder, but I use it as a stand-alone. It is perfect to hold all my current makeup tools and products. Because it’s not a giant makeup bag, I’m not tempted to overload it with a shadow I use once a month or extra tools that I don’t really need. It just has my current “daily face” necessities. I imagine it could hold jewelry that you take on a trip, sewing supplies, and . . . well, your thoughts?

Life is back to normal because Mad Men is back on TV.
So I was reading the latest issue of Time magazine where Joe Hamm is interviewed.

(Great photo of him, too, by the way.)

Here’s his answer to the question, “Has playing Don Draper influenced your personal style?”

Joe Hamm: “I’m more conscious of what goes into dressing up. My personal style is not quite up to snuff with Mad Men. But the difference between a nice suit and a suit that isn’t tailored to fit you is significant. It’s very much a statement about a person who’s ready to look like he’s in control of a situation.”

So true! Fit is part of my CSF Formula which stands for Color-Style-Fit. You need all three working for you in order to look and feel your best. Bad fit is big drag. Okay, I’m hearing you say, “No kidding! Why, I remember this one time when I was wearing this . . . ”  Tell us all about it. Use the comment space to share your story.

incredible prints

Is this gorgeous or what? Fall fashion is going to be showing us lots of print combinations–some of which should not be tried at home at all! But this is a great example of prints gone wild and they’re perfect! I’d love to nestle inside this outfit on a crisp winter’s day. It’s an Oleana sweater. I see things like this at the Hostfest in October in Minot, North Dakota when I go there. Wish they’d be showing them there this year (hint, hint, Laura who is my Facebook friend who showed this to me!). Hope you get a chance to just take a break and feast on this beautiful image!

There is no one that I know of who can get absolutely absorbed by the texture of a fabric, the drape of a silk scarf around her neck or the sparkle of a pretty brooch she wears on a jacket. I’m talking about my mother. Her inquisitiveness knows no end. Shopping with her is a focused event. Nothing distracts her from touching every sweater on a shelf, methodically looking over every blouse on a rounder or patiently holding every pair of earrings in her hand before she selects the item that has won her heart.

As a teenager, I wanted to be anywhere but in a store with my mother. I’m sure my father feels that way still. How curious it is to me then that I was the one that became an image consultant spending hours getting paid for personal shopping!

As a young child, she sewed my clothes for me. I hated standing still while she meticulously marked the hem in those beautiful dresses. I wanted to be outside with my brothers climbing trees and hiking deep into the pastures next to our farm. There were four kids in our family and we lived modestly yet very item in our home was well shopped for and selected even if it wasn’t expensive. She knew how to put a room together, design a beautiful garden and create great outfits for everyone in her family.

We moved off the farm and into town by the time I was in high school. My mother would take me shopping to the most expensive store on Broadway in Fargo, North Dakota the day after Christmas when everything was half off. On the 26th of December, my mother had me trapped in a dressing room while she went through the merchandise and selected dresses she thought would be good on me. I particularly remember one of those shopping events. She had me try on one dress that was really on the short side—probably three inches above my knee. “Really?” I said to her growing more and more impatient. “But it’s short!” I complained. “Brenda,” she said, “this dress is flirty, and every girl needs a flirty dress in her wardrobe.” I don’t know if I’ve ever had as many compliments as I had whenever I wore any of the three dresses she bought for me that day. They were unique, high quality and each one was different from the other.

When I think about the gifts she has given me, I have a hard time believing that I deserve them. She was a steadfast teacher and model to me all the while in my mind I was resisting her ideals and downplaying her talents. I didn’t grow up thinking I wanted to be like her. I wanted to change the world, make a difference, shake things up. Moving two thousand miles away to California was the start of that shakeup.

After a couple of forks in my career path, I landed on image consulting in my early thirties. Twenty-five years later, I change the world, one happy client at a time. When I’m sitting on the floor of a dressing room and my client is in a dress that’s too long, I pull out my dress pins and start marking the perfect hem. When I am selecting a necklace for a client, I patiently wait to discover the perfect one that makes that client shine and glow with pride. I want to make my client’s life easier and more efficient so she can go out and make a difference in the world.

My mother has made a huge difference in my world. And in some ways, every client I touch, every image consultant that I train is getting a little bit of my mom in the things I teach. This summer I’ll be home and we’ll go shopping together. I can’t wait.

As Mother’s Day approaches and you think about your own mother, maybe you’ll recall things she taught you about fashion or about life. Please share!

I’m a day late–and don’t tell me who got kicked off of Idol this week because I’m still watching last night’s show. I had to put the TV on pause to write down what guest mentor Usher had to say to American Idol contestant Siobhan Magnes. He coached her on her song but then said, “Have you thought about your wardrobe?” She was dressed in a totally mixed up outfit which caught Usher’s attention–not in a good way. Usher told Shobhan, “You want to be sure that you don’t have so much going on that people get away from what you have to offer as a vocalist.”

Siobhan had her worst week so far. She was off key in about a dozen places. Randi commented on her boots. He liked them. Simon thought she was all over the place with her song and added, “You look all over the place too.”

Presenting oneself, whether on American Idol or on life’s stage wherever you are, has a lot to do with the packaging. How are you packaging yourself? Are you all over the place? Are you making it easy to communicate with? Are you pushing people away or drawing them in? Clothes do so much talking for us. I hope they’re telling the true story about you.

The twins, Brent & Brenda, in Davy Crockett outfits

I was watching CBS Sunday morning this week and they paid tribute to Fess Parker from Davy Crockett TV fame who had just passed away. I don’t think my twin brother and I had very many matching outfits, but I do remember our Davy Crockett outfits. There’s a story about Brent making a fuss in church because he wanted to be in his Davy Crockett outfit and mom and dad wouldn’t let him wear it there.

I dug out a photo and there we are, sometime during the craze for all things Davy Crockett, maybe around 1955. Even though we lived on a farm and the nearest town had 75 people in it, my mom was always so fashionably dressed and I guess this is proof that she was quite aware of current trends of the time!

I wasn’t always taller than Brent. He gained on me in high school. What you hear about twins is true–we’re very close in ways that are sometimes hard to explain.

There was a period of time when we were estranged for 6 very strange years. One time I was talking to my friend Patti, my best friend since high school who lives in Minnesota, and I was telling her all the crazy upending details about a guy I was dating at the time. I wanted her to tell me what to do next.

“Call your brother Brent,” she said. Was I hearing her right? She knew about the estrangement. “He’s probably watching the NCAA championship game tonight, right?” she said. “Well, I’m sure he is,” I said. He’s a sports nut. And I am kind of one too. “Call him up and ask if you can watch the game with him,” she said. He and I lived in the same town at that time. ”And this has what exactly to do with my guy troubles?” I asked. “Nothing,” she said. “It just came to me and I think you should do it,” she said.

So I did. I called him up. I hadn’t used his phone number in six years but it was easy to dial. I asked him if he was watching the game at home. When he said yes, I asked if I could come and watch it with him. He said, “Sure. How about I order a pizza?”

So after 6 years of not talking, we got together that night and watched a basketball game together. It ended the estrangement. And the situation with the guy took care of itself. He was out of the picture shortly after that game which was the right thing as well.

When I think about it today we’re in the middle of that same NCAA tournament. I’m kind of amazed about how that all went down. It’s the power of my friendship with Patti that made me pick up the phone that day and do what she told me to do.

Brent and I don’t live in the same town anymore. We’re about 45 minutes away from each other while the rest of our family is in Minnesota. When St. Mary’s won last weekend to advance and play this week in the Sweet 16, Brent was the one I called. We hashed over the juicy details of that great game and I even contributed some sports knowledge about St. Mary’s that he didn’t have. It will probably never happen again, but he gave me praise.

If you don’t watch anything about this famed college tournament, you want to go to You Tube when it’s over on April 5th and watch the film montage that goes along with the song, “One Shining Moment.” You can’t watch it without getting tears in your eyes.

It’s one of my shining moments that something was healed all those years ago, and I got my brother back.

Woke up this morning thinking of red carpets, statuettes, paparazzi and goody bags. Didn’t you? Can’t wait for the Oscar show even though it’s a marathon TV watching event and the only way to get through long hours of TV is with extra portions of popcorn.

I got to thinking about the team it takes to prepare for a walk on the red carpet and started thinking about MY team. Who would I put in charge of makeup, hair, dresses, shapers, etc.? Easy! Names popped into my head immediately. Here they are.

For hair I’m going with Ginger Burr. Ginger and I served together on the international board of the Association of Image Consultants International about a million years ago. The entire board (we were coming from all parts of the US) gathered in Fort Worth, Texas for a strategic planning session one long weekend. Before one of our dinners out, Ginger gave me hair that made my board members proud. She curled it and made it big and glamorous. I looked mostly like myself only better. Go Ginger!

For makeup, I’ll go with Colleen Abrie from Burlingame. She plays with makeup like Julia Child played with ingredients for a dinner party. An artist! I wish I could replicate what she does to my face but I don’t have the makeup gene. However, when she compliments me on my makeup when I run into her in public (this does not happen every time I see her!), I float on a cloud the rest of the day.

For my dress, I’ll go with what has worked in the past. Five years ago I was the “superstar” in an event called, “Secrets from a Style Superstar.” It was a fashion show sponsored by our local chapter of AICI. I was the speaker and MC of the event held in a big San Francisco downtown hotel as we showed real women in real clothes and gave the audience lots of styling tips to take home with them. We had live music for the runway show, the Klein Trio, a jazz combo that had a red-headed young man playing the standup bass, named Trevor Kinsel  (my son). I had to dress to impress and I did. Again, I looked sort of like myself, only better. Much better.

Lea Ditson, a favorite local designer with a big following, dressed me for that event. I met her at her studio and together we chose fabrics and concocted a most wonderful outfit. It was a tea-length full skirt in persimmon orange floral silk taffeta, a bustier type underpiece and a striped silk multi-colored cropped gold jacket with 3/4 sleeves. She added gorgeous jewels to my neck and embroidered slipper type heels with open backs to my feet. I often bring clients to her studio to be outfitted for special events. How delightful to be enjoying the role reversal.

Although I didn’t need to wear one that night, if I was wearing something really clingy, I’d put Bianca Stark-Falcone on my team. She’d be in charge of all shaping and taping. When it comes to undergarments, she really knows her stuff!

To get tips for walking the red carpet, I’d choose Catherine Schuller. She can produce fashion shows with the same ease I can make a peanut butter sandwich. I’ve seen her in action. In fact, at a Divabetics event that I participated in with her, she even taught my sweetheart, Russ, how to walk the runway as he escorted one of the models in the show at the Paramount movie studios in LA.

And my assistant who would tell me which camera to face and remind me of the designers and jewelry makers who had contributed to this big magnificent fluff of a person floating down the red carpet (me) would be Nicole Fersel who holds details together better than a ziplock bag holds chocolate chip cookies. (Maybe I’ll make some of those for tomorrow night …)

There you have it! There’s my team. And really, except for the dress designer, they are all friends I’ve met through AICI. Good friends, talented all of them, there when I need them … I feel like a winner!

Leslie Lawton, a local jewelry designer, sent me a reminder of this popular annual San Francisco event.

If you love fine crafts, this is the place to be next weekend. I’ve been there many times. I’d always go to check out my favorite wearable art designers but you’ll also find fine photographers, ceramicists, printmakers, leather workers, glass artists, furniture makers, fiber artists, and of course, jewelers. (Leslie is in Booth F 810)

The Contemporary Crafts Market
Saturday March 13th and Sunday March 14th
10 a.m. to 5 p.m.
Festival Pavilion at Fort Mason
Buchanan at Marina Boulevard
San Francisco, CA 94123

Here’s something Leslie said that I so agree with. When you read it, ask yourself if you’re a woman who is willing to be seen. Here’s Leslie:

“The beauty of art to wear is that the visual ideas don’t wear out. They become timeless – treasures you want to wear and wear and wear. In a world that is becoming ever more commoditized, this kind of style has real meaning. The art you wear isn’t superficial. It expresses your essence. Your choices tell others who you are, that you’re willing to be seen, that you’re proud of yourself. This actually takes a surprising amount of courage. I’ve seen women shyly put something on and literally start to glow. It’s a beautiful thing.”

I can’t watch the Olympics without reliving fond memories of being in Vancouver a year and a half ago. I went there to do some radio and TV spots for my book, Fashion Makeover. Everyone I met was so great. One couple really stood out. I was in the green room of The Fanny Kieffer Show in the Shaw Tower. I couldn’t help but notice the striking woman in white linen pants, an orange shirt and the greatest handbag. She just looked . . . joyful! She and her husband were there to talk about healthy food and healthy living. Of course, her handbag drew me in and that led to a great conversation.

Doug & Diane met as Olympic athletes

Turns out Diane and her husband, Dr. Doug Clement, met each other as athletes at the 1956 Olympics in Melbourne, Australia. They’re passionate about great food, good nutrition and exercise. All the good stuff. Here they are in the green room. I’m pulling their book out again. It’s called Start Fresh, Your Complete Guide to Midlifestyle Food and Fitness. They were so inspiring and I’m so happy I met them.

I’ll be in Vancouver again in May for the Association of Image Consultants convention where I’ll be teaching a course. It will be fun to revisit favorite places. Watching the Olympics is making me itchy to get there again! And seeing this picture of Doug and Diane makes me want to follow their advice. They are radiant!

1. Wear comfortable shoes. I know you want to wear the sexiest ones you own but only if you’re getting dropped off at the front door of the restaurant and not having to park and walk. A client wore her killer heels and they nearly killed her when she had blocks to walk with a new date. Ouch!

2. Wear a smaller handbag than what you’re used to. The restaurants are packed and you don’t want your big work bag to knock someone off their chair as you squeeze by their table. I was that person one Valentine’s Day that nearly got injured!

3. You don’t HAVE to wear red-red to stay true to Valentine’s Day. While still being in the romantic theme, you can choose shades of pink, rose, merlot, even red-violet. Not all shades of red are equally attractive on everybody. Wear whatever flatters you!

4. Eat something before you leave for dinner. A growling stomach isn’t your best feature! Restaurants are notoriously packed on Valentine’s Day and long waits are not unusual even with your reservation. Stay relaxed and calm with some food in your belly.

5. If you have to wear the sexy bra, be sure you’re wearing the loose tunic top.

6. If you’re wearing the tight top, be sure you’re wearing a t-shirt bra with no surface lace.

7. This is a great time to wear something you know your partner likes–his or her favorite pair of jeans on you, a favorite dress or sweater. It’s nice to think of the “other” on this special day.

8. Be comfortable in whatever you decide to wear. There’s a lot of pressure on this day and it’s not the time to wear something that is a size smaller than you should be wearing–which will hold your attention more than the sweetheart across the table from you. (“Ouch, this waistband is digging into my stomach!!”) This is for men and women. Guys, don’t pull out the nicer slacks and find they’re too small and wear them anyway.

9. If you’re a conservative dresser by nature, make what’s under your clothes a surprise!

10. Schedule an appointment for an updo, a mani/pedi or a facial to pamper yourself whether you’re going on a date or not!

11. Buy yourself a gift that would otherwise be bought by a “boyfriend or husband” if you’re not connected with someone. A colleague of mine does this and she’s acquired some great jewelry honoring herself this way!