68 In Wardrobe Wellness

If you’re going back to your natural hair color be prepared to change your wardrobe!

 

To color or not to color? That’s a question many women are asking themselves. After years and years of coloring their hair, doing the highlights and lowlights and middlelights, they’re wondering if going natural would simplify their lives.

Here’s something to consider as you wrestle with this decision: If you go natural, your wardrobe colors will need to change and you’ll need to go shopping. Don’t worry about the money. Just think how much you’ll be saving when you call it quits to all the hair appointments. You’ll have what you need to buy the items required to get your wardrobe balanced and purring along. Besides, I’m going to help you with some shopping strategies.

Case in point: from redhead to icy platinum

One of my clients had been a redhead from some time early in her adult life on into her 60s. It wasn’t Prince Harry red, it was more Susan Sarandon red. Colors she wore so well included olive green, mustard yellow, caramel brown, and terra cotta.

Over time we noticed that her hair roots were nearly white. One day she asked me what I thought about her going natural. I said, “Your root color is just gorgeous! It’s bright and vibrant looking. You’d look great in your natural color.”

She did it. She let it grow out. It was a commitment but she stuck with it. On subsequent closet visits we realized we had to do something about her wardrobe. Her clothes were looking like they belonged in someone else’s closet, like Susan Sarandon’s.

Bit by bit we exited her warm color palette and began bringing in cooler colors. I wish you were looking in the mirror with me and seeing her reflection the first time I put a raspberry-colored scarf around her neck. G-O-R-G-E-O-U-S. I couldn’t contain myself! After seeing how great she looked in bright, clear colors there was no going back. On the next shopping trip I got her into bright pants in cobalt blue and hot pink. She looked fabulous in white or any print that had white as its base. Oh, and silver was beautiful on her. Later I found things that were turquoise and magenta.

Even her shoe colors changed. Brown or olive green shoes and boots were sent to the consignment store. Now she enjoys wearing shoes in silver, pewter, bright blue and shades of bright pink. Her feet are so happy!

 

Gray linen blazer that works with hair color

My gray linen blazer will be in full use again this summer

 

It happened to me with the encouragement of my hair stylist

When we moved up to Sonoma I got a new hairstylist and colorist. She was the one who encouraged me to go natural. “Really?” I said while squirming in the hydraulic chair. She told me many of her clients were doing it. It took me a few months to decide but then I jumped on the bandwagon. My hair color went from an artificial chestnut brown with strong hints of red to an ash light-to-medium brown. It went from warm to cool.

 

You change one thing and everything changes

 

We’ve all heard that line before about changing one thing and everything changes. It probably was in a different context than hair color. But it’s very true when it comes to introducing your new untreated hair color into your closet. Your clothes colors are going to fight. It takes a bit of time to find the sweet spot between your hair color and colors that are friendly to it.

Start simply.

When this happened to me, I got a strong foundation first by choosing a new neutral color for outerwear and accessories. While my neutral color back then was a warm brown, now I needed shades of gray to look put together and harmonious.

I’d never worn gray before. Now it was turning into my new best friend.

Charcoal, ash, smoke, fog, pewter, graphite, pebble, gunmetal, slate. They are all great shades with my hair color.

 

J.Jill gray jacket

Should I add a gray spring jacket this year? Absolutely!

 

So starting with outerwear, I looked at bringing gray into jackets, coats, blazers and shawls. If that outerwear piece relates to your hair color it makes you looked pulled together immediately.

 

Introducing gray into my wardrobe

This J.Jill jacket and my gray plaid sweater are easy pieces to reach for

 

I’m pretty thrilled with any shade of gray right now. Honestly, it’s so exciting. It’s like having a love affair to wear a new-to-your-life color that you feel so delicious in!

Here I’m adding raspberry to my J.Jill Chelsea coat. Purchasing gray cashmere fingerless gloves was a no-brainer. Note the gunmetal earring. These are earrings I could wear every day.

 

Shades of gray in your wardrobe

Adding a raspberry scarf to J.Jill Chelsea coat

 

Chico's necklace

My multi strand Chico’s necklace is a winner

 

Let’s talk more about accessories. Think bracelets, necklaces, earrings, rings, scarves. I used to rely on gold, burnished gold, and copper as my main accessory colors. They were perfect with my warm hair color. Now I’m favoring pewter, matte silver and my very favorite, gunmetal.

Here is the gray shawl I wore all fall and winter (by Echo) with my gunmetal necklace and the shoulder strap of a handbag that I’m using as a belt. I’m essentially building gray Beauty Bundles. As I collect gray accessories, I make getting dressed super easy.

 

Gunmetal accessories

My gray Beauty Bundle takes shape

 

Here I’m enjoying lighter shades of gray in this outfit I’d wear to a party.

 

Shades of gray for a party outfit

 

My leopard print accents went from brown and caramel to shades of gray. I wear my gunmetal cuff and arty ring constantly!

 

Gray leopard print scarf

My leopard prints are cooler now.

 

Do you see that with some strategic shopping you could easily start building core pieces into your wardrobe that will be friendly to your new/old hair color? Start with outerwear and then accessories and then branch out. I don’t wear gray exclusively by any means. Although to be honest, I probably get on a roll with it from time to time. I am always keeping my eyes open to pieces that would add to my gray collection but really, I’m pretty much set. I did add other colors as well but more slowly. I wanted to get my base covered by focusing on my new best neutral shade.

Have you been thinking about making changes with your hair? Have you already? What did you notice about what worked and didn’t? Let’s talk hair! I can’t wait to hear your comments!

XO

 

 

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68 Comments

  • Reply
    Kathy
    March 29, 2018 at 3:32 am

    Oh Brenda! This is so timely! I’m going to my natural color as we speak! It’s been four months since I colored my roots. I’m nervous, afraid I might not make it and in need of direction for the new me. I am mostly charcoal gray with some white “patches”! I’m so anxious to discover the new me! Thank you for the tips!

    • Reply
      Brenda
      March 30, 2018 at 5:01 pm

      Happy to be here to give you encouragement. I hope it works out to your satisfaction. As I told myself, “If you don’t like it you can always go back to coloring it.” You’ll know! Wishing you patience as you find your new direction!

  • Reply
    Isabella
    March 29, 2018 at 4:05 am

    I changed my hair color recently, and yes I am wearing different colors

    but didn’t go grey, just.can’t.do.it

    • Reply
      Brenda
      March 30, 2018 at 4:59 pm

      You’re adorable. Just love the way you wrote that. And I’m so glad you shared that because in no way would I say growing it out is for everyone. Because it’s just not. All best to you!

  • Reply
    gk
    March 29, 2018 at 4:05 am

    I love your writing so much, you are so positive and encouraging and I always feel inspired and upbeat after leaving your blog.
    Any tips on salt and pepper hair? Transitioning from v dark hair towards gray is a long slow process it seems. I think I just look dowdy.

    • Reply
      Brenda
      March 30, 2018 at 4:57 pm

      I don’t know how long your hair is but getting a shorter cut could help. Salt and pepper hair is so unique. Can you just go with it and enjoy the process? Or maybe brighter jewelry, like silver earrings and necklaces or scarves with silver threads? And blush!!

  • Reply
    Ramona Puckett
    March 29, 2018 at 4:18 am

    I let my hair color go natural in my early 40’s (!) and now at almost 63, it’s a silver y grey and I wear a lot of gray, white and bright colors. When I was 42, my stylist told me we used two boxes of highlights and the next time, it would be 3! I thought uh no, I didn’t want to be a slave to hair color! Anyway, I love it and get compliments all the time! So, gals, set your self free!

    • Reply
      Kathy
      March 29, 2018 at 11:39 am

      That’s how I feel…I want to be free! You just have to adjust I think your makeup, clothing selections and your attitude!

      • Reply
        Brenda
        March 30, 2018 at 4:27 pm

        Good advice, Kathy.

    • Reply
      Kathy
      March 29, 2018 at 11:39 am

      That’s how I feel…I want to be free! You just have to adjust I think your makeup, clothing selections and your attitude!

    • Reply
      Brenda
      March 30, 2018 at 4:55 pm

      Hey everyone, I say if it’s right for you do what Ramona says! That’s amazing that it was going to take three boxes of highlights. Wowzers! Thanks for sharing!

  • Reply
    Eleanor O'Neill
    March 29, 2018 at 4:23 am

    Love the black booties you’re wearing in the top few photos Brenda! You’re style is awesome!

    • Reply
      Brenda
      March 30, 2018 at 4:53 pm

      Thanks so much, Eleanor!

  • Reply
    Nancy Karpen
    March 29, 2018 at 5:29 am

    I started going gray in my early 20’s and was dyeing it by the time I was 26. My mother and grandmother were both pure white by the time they were 60 so I eventually set that as my cut off date. In April before my 60th birthday I stopped coloring my hair. I am now 67 and it was the best decision. I was pure white at 60. I too noticed that the browns and tans were no longer my friends. I had a really gorgeous tan linen jacket that I put on that summer and it was very obvious that I could no longer wear those warm browns and tans. Gray’s are my new neutrals from silver to dark gray. I have a nice collection of silver jewelry that works really well with it. I wear black quite a bit too, and it works.
    I used to wear yellows which I don’t think works anymore either. I’ll have to try some raspberry and turquoise. Hot pink is a road too far though! I do have some brights in scarves and other accessories.
    Going white has been very empowering as wells a hell of a lot cheaper!

    • Reply
      Brenda
      March 30, 2018 at 4:53 pm

      I’m with you, Karen. I sure don’t mind NOT paying for all those hair appointments anymore! I shocked myself by putting on a cool yellow last year. I wrote a blog post about it. I’m glad you brought that up because it’s time for me to pull that coat out and wear it again this spring. I’m sharing that with you as you may run into a yellow that really works. Love hearing about your journey!

  • Reply
    Dorothy
    March 29, 2018 at 6:11 am

    So true! I noticed that when I went gray I had to move my wardrobe into bright and white! The colors are more joyful and affirming than anything I wore in my younger years. It has been very liberating.

    • Reply
      Brenda
      March 30, 2018 at 4:50 pm

      Oh, I love to hear those words: affirming and liberating. Isn’t it amazing how that can happen with hair color? Good for you, Dorothy. I’m inspired and I’m sure others are too!

  • Reply
    Rebecca
    March 29, 2018 at 6:20 am

    My hair started turning white after the birth of my second child due to an undiagnosed autoimmune illness. Now I have mostly black hair, with pure white at the front and underneath. I have definitely had to change what I wear. I always wore cool colours, but I find I need more brightness now, so instead of black, I opt for navy blue, white and some shades of grey. I am slowly buying more tops in those colours but for now I am sticking to black pants and shoes because that is easiest for work.

    • Reply
      Brenda
      March 30, 2018 at 4:49 pm

      Rebecca, it sounds like you have a great working plan with your colors. How very pretty to have that pure white underneath! Your hair color sounds so unique. When I was writing about gray, navy blue was saying, “Hey, don’t forget about me!” That is another favorite “new” neutral. And there’s so much variation in navy blues. I think the shades are getting more and more interesting. Thanks for sharing!

  • Reply
    Diane
    March 29, 2018 at 6:54 am

    I decided to let the white come in about 3 years ago. The white is mostly in the front, and I keep a full bang to play that up. At the same time I encouraged the full curl and now just love that part as well. I keep an updated cut to stay current, and I get compliments all the time on the colour. I find that black is not my friend, but have been using grey and the blues from my eye colour. Pink is another favorite that replaces the reds I used to wear. I kept going back to your teaching in the book about following your natural colours found in your skin and eyes and that really works. White shirts are still good with the neckline full of grey or silver accessories. I do look forward to the rest of my hair getting to the white that I crave but in the meantime I just go with what is there. Great post about your journey. Here here to the silver sirens.

    • Reply
      Brenda
      March 30, 2018 at 4:46 pm

      Your comment gave me a giggle. Here here to the silver sirens gave me an image of a whole convention hall filled with shades of gray and silver! Thanks for sharing the direction your wardrobe has gone. I’m seeing the pink for sure. Keep enjoying your colors and inspiring others!

  • Reply
    Syd Waskey
    March 29, 2018 at 7:41 am

    A very timely post as I too am letting my hair go grey! I’ve been coloring my hair an ashy blonde for years so I’m lucky that the grow-out isn’t as dramatic as it could have been. In order to lessen the “shock” of going totally grey my hairdresser is weaving in some blonde highlights while I let it grow. I guess I’m also lucky in that my wardrobe can pretty much stay the same as I’ve always worn “cool” colors! Love this post!

    • Reply
      Brenda
      March 30, 2018 at 4:44 pm

      It sounds like your hair experience is the one many people would envy. Good for you. So glad you shared it. Many others will have a similar experience as you had and you’re sharing it will be encouraging. Thanks, Syd!

  • Reply
    Cara
    March 29, 2018 at 8:10 am

    Thanks for the tips, Brenda.
    Most of my hair is about the color of the background in your leopard scarf, Brenda, but it’s much lighter right in the front by my face. My eyes are brown, and I still wear a lot of brown, even brown leopard, and it seems to do OK with me (or perhaps I’m delusional).
    Since college, I’ve always gravitated towards what I jokingly call “boring” colours (like your “nothing” earrings) , even when my hair was brown. I like neutrals and my wardrobe is filled with black, gray, brown, and muted colors, EXCEPT there’s a particular deep, bright turquoise that I love and I have a silk jacket in that colour and would have more things if I could find them.

    I love having gray hair!

    • Reply
      Brenda
      March 30, 2018 at 4:42 pm

      Cara, your neutral colored wardrobe sounds dreamy to me. I find so much beauty in neutrals. It doesn’t surprise me at all that you’re still wearing brown with your brown eyes. That you have brown eyes seems like a bonus to me. I’d like to be staring at your wardrobe with your closet doors open right now!

      • Reply
        Cara
        March 31, 2018 at 9:37 am

        How sweet, Brenda–You are such a bright, upbeat person! I should send you a picture of my tiny closet!
        I’m getting ready for a trip to Central Europe mid April & was starting to pack (completely different clothes from what we normally wear her in S. FL) and realized I had so MANY brown knit tops. I didn’t even remember buying some of them (at thrift stores). But I realized it’s nice to have back-ups because they’re a staple of my wardrobe.
        Good to be prepared!
        Have a wonderful weekend!

        • Reply
          Brenda
          March 31, 2018 at 2:16 pm

          Thanks, Car! I hope you have a great trip and an easy time packing. Have a great weekend too!

  • Reply
    Joy Karl
    March 29, 2018 at 8:22 am

    Hi Brenda, I too, took the plunge. My hair is not as gray and not as cool as I thought it would be. Have started switching accessories out but my biggest problem is my base color. Some of the cool grays just wash me out. Could you do a post on different values and colors of gray and how to choose? I am a brownette-right in the middle of warm and cool. Too much either way is not good. I call my hair color khaki gray-lol.

    • Reply
      Brenda
      March 30, 2018 at 4:40 pm

      Oh my gosh, I love how you’ve labeled your hair color! To find that right shade you’ll have to hunt a little harder than most. I have the feeling it’s something you’ll know when you see it. I love the idea of a tutorial. It’s a hard time of year to do that as spring fashions are so bright right now. It’ll have to go in my idea file. I really hope you find the right shade. A cool khaki? Wish we could walk around a store together and I’d help you!

  • Reply
    Charlene H
    March 29, 2018 at 8:35 am

    I have not dyed my hair because I’m too cheap! I am fortunate in that my hairdresser tells me that I have “natural” highlights of gray/white in my thick black Asian hair. I have been asked if I did that on purpose. :). Another friend of mine went natural and it took ten years off her face! Instead of harsh tones, her new, softer gray complements her skin tones and brightens her smile. One thing we both do is keep current with our haircuts and styling. Hers is a bob with layering added now and then. Mine is very short worn “spiky” by adding product. I turn 69 this Saturday.

    • Reply
      Brenda
      March 30, 2018 at 4:37 pm

      Happy Birthday, Charlene! Thank you so much for sharing these hair stories! Isn’t it amazing how hair can surprise you with what it does naturally? I see the exact same thing happening with my friend who is also Asian. What’s coming in is so striking and gorgeous. And people would pay for that look if they could! Hope your day is great.

  • Reply
    Sharon Olsen
    March 29, 2018 at 9:51 am

    Brenda, I made the choice 5 years ago after coloring my hair since my mid 20’s due to becoming premature gray and NOT in a nice way—I looked mousy and frumpy, so colored for years until my roots became silver. Of course, after I went through this, they have now come out with all of the fabulous root powders and colors!! One thing I found was my makeup no longer worked!! I am still struggling with this, especially lipstick. I absolutely love the raspberry color you wear. Would you be willing to share the make and color? I take inspiration from you and thank you for the work you do on your musings.

    • Reply
      Brenda
      March 30, 2018 at 4:34 pm

      Yes, makeup needs attention to. I’m happy to share! My current raspberry is by MAC and it’s the Liptensity line, sort of matte but very creamy, not drying. My color is called Marsala. Another one is a matte lipstick by Laura Mercier and it’s the Extreme formula. The color is Power. They’re both great! Hope that helps, Sharon. Thanks for sharing.

  • Reply
    Elaine @ Following Augustine
    March 29, 2018 at 9:57 am

    Though I dabbled with dying my hair in my 30s, I chose to keep my hair’s natural colour even when it started going grey which it has been doing very slowly for a very long time. When I was younger, brown was my neutral too and I wore lots of beige, khaki, and olive green. I looked quite ghastly in black or white, but as more grey slowly came in I began to notice that the colours I could wear changed. Like you, grey is by far my favourite neutral now and I can even wear black and white. While I used to automatically gravitate to the brown tones when I shopped, they don’t attract me at all anymore. Even the jewelry that I can wear has changed. I used to wear only gold, but now I’ve transitioned to mostly silver.

    • Reply
      Brenda
      March 30, 2018 at 4:31 pm

      I’m so glad we’re talking about this subject! Your experience will surely help others who have been pondering this move or wondering why the colors they wore weren’t working so well anymore. Thank you, Elaine!

  • Reply
    Angie
    March 29, 2018 at 10:02 am

    Hi, Brenda! I really like how you recommend starting with your outerwear and then accessories and focusing on your new neutral as the way to transform your color palette. I haven’t gone to natural gray, but I recently recognized that my hair is naturally ash blonde with gray coming in. I used to think I was warm blonde because I tan easily, but I was fooled because my coloring is neutral and can go either way. So I recently set myself to task with changing my wardrobe from warm and bright to cool and muted. It was difficult at first, but now I’m absolutely loving the new soft palette I have when I look inside my closet. It goes perfectly with the soft look I’ve had my whole life (it’s like a look you can see in my face and eyes). Women can look beautiful by coloring their hair a pretty color and dressing to match, but they can look the MOST beautiful by being themselves and finding the colors that go with the ones in their natural hair, skin…AND EYES. I emphasize eyes because the colors that look best on you are probably the colors in your eyes. So Cara is right to wear browns. The best browns for her, though, would depend on whether her coloring is warm or cool, clear or muted. There are cool browns and warm browns, etc. I hadn’t let go of my brown-toned leopard, but have been looking for leopard prints with more white in them. I already know I don’t want warm beige and gold in my leopard prints anymore…but I’m not letting go of my faux fur leopard coat and vest. Thank God I’m neutral and can get away with it. Lol! Anyway, thanks a bunch! — Angie, http://www.yourtrueselfblog.com

    • Reply
      Brenda
      March 30, 2018 at 4:30 pm

      Angie, I’m giving you a standing ovation. I love hearing about your experience and agree with your advice. My favorite brown right now is cocoa brown, that powdery cool cocoa brown. It has a little gray in it. LOVE it! There are solutions and tricks for every one!

  • Reply
    Vicki
    March 29, 2018 at 12:42 pm

    I’m just about to turn 60 and am so tempted to grow my colour out. I am definately getting greyer but it will always be boring salt and pepper. Yet Brenda your hair looks great. I’m a professional woman so am tempted to wait until I retire. Thoughts? How long does it take to grow out and what do you do with it in the mean time?

    • Reply
      Brenda
      March 30, 2018 at 4:26 pm

      I’d be tempted to keep your color appointments until you’re retired. That’s my first hit. The job force has it’s own ageism issues and I’d hate to have you get snagged up in that. But it also depends on the job. I chopped my long hair off and went super short. That wasn’t quite a shock to me as it was to others. I used to have super closely shaved hair in the 80s. So I just kept going to my hair stylist (the one who encouraged me to stop with the coloring) and had her make it as cute as she could. I wore hats. It was winter so I could wear knit hats a lot. And then a triple dose of patience each and every day. If it was easy, everyone would do it!

  • Reply
    Anne
    March 29, 2018 at 1:27 pm

    What did you do with your wardrobe of clothing/jewellery in the colours you knew no longer looked as good? For years I thought I was a cool muted season, then discovered I looked so much better in warm colours. I gradually changed my wardrobe, which now feels and looks right on me. However I have several pieces of silver jewellery that were given to me by my husband, and now they just don’t look right with the other things I’m wearing! I put my silver bracelet or earrings on, and as much as i love them, i just have to change them back to gold ones. I’d love to know if there’s any way around this problem.

    • Reply
      Brenda
      March 30, 2018 at 4:23 pm

      One thing you could do Anne is wear mixed metals. You don’t have to wear all cool or all warm at one time. This helped me an awful lot and in fact, I still prefer doing the mix from time to time. I think you could take your silver earrings to a fine jeweler and have them dipped in gold something or other. Don’t quote me on this but one of my clients told me she’d down that at Soffia Jewelers in Mill Valley. I’d try that route as well. Good for you for having a wardrobe that feels like you!

  • Reply
    Cindy Scurry
    March 29, 2018 at 2:25 pm

    I love your style! Your advise is awesome. I’m not ready yet to go natural as I’m dark blonde and just dull without some highlighting at this point. But one day….. I continue to look to you for inspiration!

    • Reply
      Brenda
      March 30, 2018 at 4:18 pm

      I love your hair color! You’ll just know that you’ll have options when the time comes. Love your style too, my friend!

  • Reply
    Mary
    March 29, 2018 at 6:36 pm

    Off topic, but I’ve been obsessing over your crystal necklace for months. Today, a friend gifted me a beautiful, large crystal. I would be grateful if you would share your source for beads, the crystal cap and method for creating your beautiful necklace. XOXO

    • Reply
      Brenda
      March 30, 2018 at 4:18 pm

      Mary it is embarrassingly simple! I went to a Gem Faire in my area and bought the beads already on chain. I think I got a three-foot length. Then I asked my daughter to finish off the connecting of the chain through the pendant with her jewelry pliers and that was it. Five minutes tops. I’d also check a bead store in your town if you have one.

      • Reply
        Mary
        March 31, 2018 at 11:26 am

        Thank you Brenda!

  • Reply
    Elizabeth Smokowski
    March 29, 2018 at 9:17 pm

    Does anyone get their “colors” done anymore? I remember that being a popular thing back in the 80s…I jave no clue what is best on me.. ash blonde hair with medium skin tone

    • Reply
      Brenda
      March 30, 2018 at 4:15 pm

      People definitely still get their colors done. I think it would be a great thing to do at this time of life. Why not get guidance so you get it right every time? I hope you find someone!

  • Reply
    Spags
    March 30, 2018 at 11:54 am

    Thanks for “highlighting” this issue Brenda! I decided not to colour my hair because I knew I would be too lazy to maintain it. I’ve definitely let grey back into my wardrobe as it creeps into my hair. It’s fun finding new colour combinations. I’m wearing more black, true reds and blues and moving towards the cooler colours. I really admire a colleague about my age whose hair is naturally silver, but she has gone flamingo pink!

    • Reply
      Brenda
      March 30, 2018 at 4:13 pm

      I agree with you about having fun finding new color combinations. It’s now what I anticipated, although of course it only makes sense! I haven’t dared do pink but I’ve seen many unique combinations. Good for her!

  • Reply
    LA CONTESSA
    March 30, 2018 at 1:47 pm

    OH YES, I’m doing it TOO!TO the HORROR of my HAIR DRESSER!
    I also just LOST Half my head of HAIR this PAST YEAR and I NEVER EVER THOUGHT THAT WOULD HAPPEN TO ME!MY hair was my BEST ACCESSORY!NOT ANY MORE……………
    SO< I am INVESTING in TURBANS!!!!!!!!!
    Wait until YOU see what I have coming !!!!!!!
    YOUR hair is still plenty dark!
    I of course, Love the idea of colors on WOMEN so GREY does not sound so bad after all………..XX

    • Reply
      Brenda
      March 30, 2018 at 4:10 pm

      Well, you are the perfect candidate for turbans. It suits your style. But it must have been scary to lose your hair. Can’t wait to see the developments! Happy weekend, Elizabeth!

  • Reply
    Mary Dana
    March 31, 2018 at 4:31 am

    At 55, I’m not quite ready to take the plunge. While it’s getting kind of silvery in the front, the rest of it is just kind of… mousey. One hair stylist referred to it as muddy ash (ouch). I’m still coloring it a warm brown. I have noticed, however, that my skin tone seems a little less warm than it used to be. I think I read somewhere once that this can happen. My clothes and makeup used to include a lot of orangey-red, but my new go-to is a bright berry. I’m experimenting with plum, but have to make sure it’s not too cool. I think it’s just awesome that more and more women, instead of dreading the changes that come with growing older, are finding that it’s a wonderful opportunity to play and experiment. We’re not stagnating, we’re GROWING older in the best sense! Thanks for your terrific posts, Brenda. I always feel a little ripple of fun when I see you’very posted something new!

    • Reply
      Brenda
      March 31, 2018 at 2:18 pm

      You’re right about skin tone. It absolutely can change. Your plan sounds great. A few visits back my hairstylist called my hair color a dirty blond. Didn’t love that description either! I love your attitude about aging. Let’s shout it from the rooftops. There’s a lot of freedom to being this age. Thanks so much for writing!

  • Reply
    Cara
    March 31, 2018 at 9:46 am

    Oh, FYI for all the gray goddesses, after looking for a long time, for an all natural shampoo and conditioner especially for gray hair (most have sodium lauryl sulphate or some permutation thereof, or other toxic ingredients), I FOUND one. It’s called Just Nutritive https://justnutritive.com/gray-hair-nutritive-shampoo/
    it’s a bit pricey, but you use very little and I’m very happy with it, and the conditioner. I think all their products look great.

    For LA CONTESSA, there’s also a product called “grow new hair.”

    I am just a satisfied customer– I have no connection at all to the company.

    • Reply
      Brenda
      March 31, 2018 at 2:15 pm

      Thanks for the tips, Cara. Always helpful.

  • Reply
    Peggy Z
    March 31, 2018 at 11:58 am

    I love this post! I have 2 sisters with snow white hair and one who still colors. Mine is salt and pepper although my pepper is a light brown. I’m so drawn to your style which I call classic with a touch of whimsy. I’m in love with that Chelsea jacket and I loved you with the navy blue jacket you bought last fall. But when you wear red it looks stunningly gorgeous! I’m trying to learn all your pointers.

    • Reply
      Brenda
      March 31, 2018 at 2:14 pm

      Peggy, thank you for keeping an eye on me. I think you’re right. I never stray far from classic even though I think I want to. And whimsy is perfect! As spring shows up I am going to try to find more colorful items. Stay tuned! You’re so lucky to have all those sisters!

  • Reply
    Alice Webb
    April 1, 2018 at 7:02 pm

    Wow, you struck a real chord with so many of us! I’m unwilling to color my salt and pepper mess and struggling to like the over-all silver result. Someone suggested Purple shampoo to keep the silver part from yellowing. (Brown eyes, dark brown hair and yellow skin under-tones) Have you used it?

    • Reply
      Brenda
      April 7, 2018 at 7:50 pm

      I haven’t used it, Alice, but I have heard about it. I’d go for it! Sounds like you have nothing to lose!

  • Reply
    La semaine d'une gourmette
    April 4, 2018 at 2:23 am

    I’m one of those weird women who never colored her hair. I used to be dark blonde, a bit of a Venitian blonde really, and age started lightening me! Now there is so much white hair that its more of a blondish icy grey overall (which, funnily enough, reminds me of when I was a kid – I had silvery highlights back then). And you’re right, it changes certain things – I spotted a very lovely copper-colored top in a store recently but as soon as I put it next to me it was “Ew! Nasty”! It totally clashed with my hair.

    • Reply
      Brenda
      April 7, 2018 at 7:39 pm

      I’ve had that same dressing room experience! Your hair color sounds so unique and great.

  • Reply
    Sandi Mcdougall
    April 4, 2018 at 12:59 pm

    Super interesting article. Don’t know that I will ever be up to letting my hair go natural but have noticed I’ve shifted away from my brown apparel to a base color of navy. Why? I have no idea. My Sanibel hairdresser put a lot of blonde highlights in my hair 6 weeks ago (especially around my face) and my grey hasn’t appeared as drastic because of this. Can’t wait to have a personal conversation about this next time we are together. Feel better.

    • Reply
      Brenda
      April 7, 2018 at 7:35 pm

      I can really see navy on you. I think as a neutral it’s just brighter and great with your hair color! It’ll be a HoDo conversation!

  • Reply
    Kerrie
    April 5, 2018 at 5:20 am

    I spend so much time agonising on this subject. As a naturally dark haired person I’m nervous of the salt and pepper look, and my complexion tends to redness. Brenda, do you have any colour in your hair now, an ashy shade? And how often do you get your hair cut? I’ve always thought the key to going grey is a really sharp haircut and yours is great. Lastly, one of the things that worries me is eyebrows! Mine are still dark! Love your blog even though it’s a shame many of your beautiful recommendations are hard to source(I’m an Australian)

    • Reply
      Brenda
      April 7, 2018 at 7:31 pm

      Kerrie, I don’t do anything color-wise to my hair. I do get it cut every six weeks or so. Short hair always needs more maintenance but I’m okay with that. I LOVE dark eyebrows on people with gray hair. Makeup and skin care can help with the redness. But really, it’s all a personal decision. Good luck making yours!

  • Reply
    Kim Seward
    April 9, 2018 at 8:09 am

    Hi Brenda,
    Just happened upon your blog., what a wonderful surprise. When I was 56, I let my hair speak and it is a beautiful silver white in front, salt and pepper back. I do receive compliments frequently. I did it mainly to stop putting chemicals on and therefore in my body since I have had to color since early 20s. Feeling free and totally authentic was a bonus! I am still changing over makeup and clothing, having green eyes I had a wide option but have found many of those colors wash me out. I am enjoying this time as well as switching out my shoes due to arthritis. Grateful we have so many options theses days! Blessings to you and for your blog!

    • Reply
      Brenda
      April 17, 2018 at 11:10 am

      Thanks, Kim. And I love the way you’re looking at this. Yes, I think we have lots of great options. I’ve got your green eyes in my mind right now. Would be fun to shop with you!

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